She calls her friend for help, but her face is clawed by an invasive hairy arm. One girl, Gretchen, decides she’s had enough for the night and heads home in her junker of a car. Under the insistence of the bartender, Kelly. Right off the bat, there are already some classic lines of poetry like: “I heard that… hooker” and “Can you not see I’m trying to get laid here?” Unfortunately, these are what all the characters are like in this movie. Some of them are trying to get laid while others only are interested in continuing the party at someone’s house, but all have to leave And those are some pretty gross memories.Īnd somehow this movie ticks all those boxes right in the first couple of frames.Ī group of friends are leaving the local bar at closing time. The Beast of Bray Road the type of movie I would expect some guy who refers to himself as a “bro” to describe this movie as “balls to the wall, dude!” Though my imaginary bro character is what I imagine was the target audience for this film. Yes I know this is a low budge movie, but this time era (the decade from about 1996 to 2006) just reminds me of tube tops, light-wash jeans, frosted hair and questionable hair choices. Plus it always brings flashbacks of Black Cadillac and I will never get over it. This is really a period of time in movie history that I hate. It follows the same legend of the Gabel moves, which is essentially a werewolf-like monster who stalks a road in southern Wisconsin. The Beast of Bray Road was released a few years later. It does a fairly good job at looking like a reel of 1970’s home footage. These two videos, called the Gabel films, tried to be a kind of found footage reel of a man seemingly getting attacked by the beast of Bray Road. If you recall, I wrote about two “short films” that were “found” in 2002. Scott worked on over 15 films for asylum in two years. Wisconsin-born director Leigh Scott was one of The Asylum’s most-used directors. The 2005 movie The Beast of Bray Road is brought to you by The Asylum, who are known for their Mockbusters and their Sharknado movies. This week’s movie was another shitter, but at least it was a remotely fun one to hate. You know you’re on to gold when one Amazon review reads, “The worst film I’ve seen since 7 heads in a Duffle Bag.” Assuming they mean 8 Heads in a Duffel Bag, I will take their point. Bar fights! Wife beating jokes! Monsters with a hairdresser! Lots and lots of guns!
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